How to Make the Internet Safe for Your Kids |
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| by Oscar Sodani | |
| March 15, 2003 | |
 Oscar Sodani is a founder of Help2Go and owner of Help2Go Networks, an IT consulting firm in the Washington D.C. area. Oscar holds the CISSP certification as well as industry certifications from Microsoft, Cisco and Novell. The tragedy at Columbine brought a lot of attention to the Internet and to violent video games. Unfortunately, news reporters knew nothing about either subject, and so were delivering the same basic story: the Internet is bad, video games are bad. But they didn't understand that the Internet can be very safe, with the proper precautions and supervision. The Internet is NOT television. The Internet is more like a city street; there are many shady people that would love to take your child's money, or worse. Many children are trusting of strangers, and children are always influenced by new ideas -- how can you police their interactions so you make sure that they're not conversing with a maniac? In this article you'll find out:
How Do I Know? Much of my teen years were spent in front of a computer -- even in the days before the Internet, a teenager could use a PC and modem to access all kinds of information. Remember the movie "WarGames"? Well, I wasn't that bad, but I was amazed at what a kid could see and do, all without regard for age. Fortunately, my parents had instilled some taste and common sense into my brain, so I managed to avoid the truly tasteless things I suddenly had free access to. The same went for video games. Frankly, I enjoy violent video games -- some of them are quite fun. However, these graphically violent games did not exist when I was younger. The early Atari and Nintendo games I played were wholesome fun. If my experiences have taught me anything, it is that a child with a computer can have virtually limitless access to all kinds of vulgar material, whether it be violent or pornographic. But this same child also has access to a wealth of information to advance their intelligence, and after all, that knowledge has helped me to a successful career and also to start this web site. Online Dangers Pornography There are laws that require these sites to determine if the viewer is over 18 years of age, so the law-abiding sites will require a credit card check. However, many pornographic sites are hosted outside of the United States, thus avoiding the law and providing extremely graphic material to anyone who ventures to their web page. Even worse, some sites use trickery to induce new members to their pornography pages: a child who mistakenly enters www.whitehouse.com instead of the real address, www.whitehouse.gov, will get an eyeful of XXX-rated material. Hate Sites Chat Rooms Enough of this chatter. Is the Internet SAFE? My years of experience say Yes. It all comes down to guidance and supervision. Think of the Internet as a city street. You wouldn't let your child walk unattended into the seedy section of the city, would you? Young children should be with their parents at all times in the city, and the same goes for the Internet. At the very least, you should be aware what neighborhoods your child wanders in to. 1) Never let your children give out personal information Children should not divulge their name, phone number, or street address to ANYONE they meet online. Make it a family rule. Also, make sure that you do not give them an e-mail address that resembles their full name, i.e. oscarsodani@aol.com 2) Know your child's favorite web sites! This is VERY important. If you don't know what sites they are visiting, find out. Surf along with them, offer advice. Talk about any information that confuses them. Let them know what kind of material you find inappropriate and impermissible for them to see. 3) Never allow personal meetings Personal meetings between two people who meet on the Internet is NEVER good. When one is a child, disaster usually strikes. Disallow all personal meetings. Remember, it is very easy for a 40-year old pedophile to masquerade as a young child for long periods of time. If your child is developing a wonderful friendship with an online persona, insist that the friendship move to the telephone, and have a talk with the other child's parents. 4) Make the PC a family tool To promote family use of the PC and the Internet, consider keeping the computer in the family room. If the computer resides in a child's bedroom, they will have more privacy to explore inappropriate materials online. A family room keeps family interaction and supervision at a maximum. 5) Guard your child's e-mail Kids can be extremely vulnerable through e-mail. The first rule is to never reply to obscene or threatening e-mail messages. By ignoring these people and deleting the e-mail they send you, you are effectively cutting off all communication with them. If you reply, they will just send you more junk. If you have a young child, share the e-mail account with them. Monitor their mail and make sure you know who they're communicating with. 6) Use Blocking and Filtering Software There is software you can buy that will help you protect your children. One type is Web-blocking software, which works with your current web browser to block out sites that are deemed inappropriate for children. The list of inappropriate sites is updated constantly by the software company, so there is minimal effort that needs to be put in by the parent. However, this is no substitute for surfing the Internet WITH your child. Filtering software works with your e-mail software to filter out any messages from "unauthorized" people. For instance, you can authorize family and friends to send e-mail to your child, and anyone else who tries will get their e-mail bounced back to them. See the Related Links section at the end of the article for links to vendors of these programs. AOL Users America Online provides special parental controls that can be set to block your child from certain online areas. Go to keyword: "parental controls" to learn more. Violence in Video Games In recent TV coverage, the news media often showed video footage from the video game "Doom". While "Doom" is a valid example of how games have become violent, the game itself is quite old in video game years. It's comparable to holding up "Jaws" as an example of today's violent films. The most recent crop of violent video games far exceeds the violence in Doom. There are publicly available games where you score points by running over civilians with your car, extorting money and harassing small business owners, cavorting with prostitutes, and even by killing innocent civilians execution-style. Some games will let you chop off people's limbs and beat them with it! These games are disgusting, and I wouldn't let my child anywhere near them. It is the responsibility of the parent/guardian to exercise control over what games your kids are playing. Grand Theft Auto is not a game for children. Check the hard drives of the computer your child is using for violent-sounding games. Usually, the title will give it away -- "Mafia", "Grand Theft Auto", "Gore", are some obvious titles. Look at the game magazines your kids subscribe to: you'd be amazed at the sex and violence marketed to kids within those pages. Today's video games also adhere to a rating system, but it is still very easy for young kids to buy these games without any interference from vendors whose only interest is the almighty dollar. Watch what they buy, watch what they play. There are plenty of great games out there that don't involve ANY overly-graphic violence (sports games, flight games, puzzle games, etc). The Verdict The Internet is going to be a BIG part of your kids' lives. They're going to learn about it quickly and they will absorb the information they find even more quickly. It is a parent's responsibility to understand what their children are doing online. We at Help2Go will try to help in whatever way we can and provide new information when it becomes available. If you have questions, try posting them in the Q&A Forum -- we'll be glad to answer any questions you have about this important topic. Have a question? Need help? Get free, friendly person-to-person help with your computer questions or spyware questions in our help forums! |
